bout damn time huh? « black berry's daily struggle. ;)

Today's Tale

Monday, October 31, 2005

bout damn time huh?

I'm sorry yall, I just been mad busy lately.

You know you been gone a while when people you don't know are signing your wall with..... " I fucked her in the ass..."

Homie, you wish.

I went to bible study last Tuesday, it almost made me cry... several times. I'm going again this tuesday. I learn that I really need to let go of any grudges I have because it isn't going to do anything but hurt me. So all those people that I don't talk to because I don't like them,

I'm going to be talking to u again.

I also learned some things about relationships that made me want to cry too.

By the way, Chris, I don't want you to think that I think that you aren't sexy or beautiful. You are. The message didn't say that you weren't. It just said... that you got hit by a damn truck. It killed you... cuz you got hit by a truck.

But... if it really hurt your feelings, I'm sorry. Its been bothering me lately.

On to other things.....

I feel like I'm just doing everything... I've been modeling at least once a week for the past 2 months.

~My hair is mad long.

~Today is Halloween and I'm dressed like a Zeta. If I can, tonight, I'll dress like a Sigma.

~I'm DJing at the BSAC halloween party tonight.

~I'm making mad progress on my bass guitar.

~I went to Amani Raha Saturday night: the night of the classic. I had alot of fun. DJ Rahdu called me and put my name on the list. I was so excited because he is the BEST DJ I know and he called me. I'm gonna be a Soul Rebel!

~ I have a bust of my head that one of the art students gave me when I modeled for the art class. It's sitting on my dreser. It freaks people out when they walk in my room.

~I need to take a pic of what I'm wearing because i'm feeling sexy today.. maybe tonight. I'll describe it: ZPHIB shirt tied up in the back and a jean jacket with a long ankle length checkered (blue and white) skirt, white k swizz a black scarf tied with a night, and my black hat (when i crossed zeta) with my number on it. I want to where the same outfit with kkpsi and a one on my hat instead of deuce. I need to get some money to get some girl kkpsi shirts made.

~ I want a new bass... apparently mine sucks. I know that its probably because I suck on the bass personally, but my teacher said my bass wasn't worth crap.

~I want som 1200s so I can DJ too.

~I'm extremely active in ZPHIB, I'm the social chair right now... I'm going to state meet this november.

oooo... btw... I met some old zetas fri. night at the sigma party. They are soooo cool. mayne. When I say those zetas are the SH*T.... they are.. they stepped and put me to shame. I learned SOO many new strolls its ridiculous.. I'm not gonna remember none of them to teach any one though.

Some dude came up to me at the club...

dude: are you in school?
me: yea
Dude: what school?
me: UAB, you?
dude: I'm not in school. What is your major?
me: PMT
dude: you know what my major would be if I were in school?
me: what? (waiting for somethings stupid)
dude: All about you.
me: that's cute.. .holla at you lata

it was funny though.

I got a GOOD amount of sleep last night. I went to sleep at 7pm and woke at 9 am. I think I caught up for all the sleep I miss all the time.

There was a time that I lived for God.
There was a time that I lived for my family.
There was a time that I lived for my boyfriend.
There was a time that I lived for my organizations.
When will I live for myself?

Should I live for myself...
or is it RIGHT to live for others..... I'm sure I SHOULD live for God but....
How can I live for God when I don't know...
The path that He wants me to follow.

Living for my family worked for a while.
Gave me inspiration to stay alive
cuz it would hurt my family.... if I died.
Time heals all wounds though
I'm sure they would pull through

I lived for my boyfriend
For the future we could have had
He freed me from loneliness, he made me laugh

Showed me what love was like, never made me sad

but good things..... never last

I lived for my organizations
Organizations keep me busy
They make me feel they need me
Or things won't get done
But with too much work, there's less fun

But should I live for myself?
Or should I live for others?
Should I should I be selfish?
Or give my life in service...?

How can I be selfish
though it hurts to care
who am I to complain
when Jesus paid the ultimate pain?

what am I to do....
I guess I'll never know....
I better settle with somethin
Or this temple just might blow.
@~

Posted at 02:11 pm by black_berry

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About Me The first thing you will notice about me is my appearence, so I'll describe that first... kinda simple.

~@Short (5'3)
~@dark skinned
~@thick bordering athletic... i haven't ran in a good while ;)
~@19B DAY is JULY 9th

Um... beyond looks you should know....

~@I'm crazy, first and foremost
~@I'm intelligent
~@I attempt to be funny
~@I am obsessed w/ most art.... I play the tuba, draw, do computer graphics (i try, lol), occasionally write poetry, speak spanish, i LOVE to dance, i like to act, and i'm learning
~@I attend UAB, I'm a sophomore in college.
~@ I no longer know what i want to do w/ my life.
~@My mommy and daddy love me, though they worry too much
~@ I grew up sheltered
~@ Im a military brat
~@ I'm fun at a party but don't follow me home
~@I like learning and understanding people and how to do things
~@I'm sick of typing.

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Message

You are listening to :Jin: Fuck the Tsunami Song

You got it twisted, If you think I'm here to cock block
On a bunch of no talent wanna-be shock jocks
Nah
And they say it's all freedom of speech
Well you just lost yours, read them and weep
Wont be happy until you're fired
My peoples is pissed holmes
And I bet you not a solo miss jones
Miss who? My point exact
and tell the rest of your staff that they need up clean up they're act
fuck the tsunami song and whoever thought of it
matter fact, fuck the engineer that recorded it
and the brains behind the scenes that applauded it
anything for ratings huh?
this shit is corporate
that little bullshit statement has gotta be, the worlds most half ass apology
thousands are still getting discovered each day
how dare you compare a life to a weeks pay
interesting, y'all quick to have a smack fest
but those that really need to ain't get slapped yet
and its rare that I'm even rapping pissed
jin is far from a human rights activist
so dont take this in a political fashion
nope its just a good old lyrical bashing
in fact I'm making it a mission of mine
wont stop till every last petition is signed
hip hop is designed to unify the masses
and we demand that you be denied the access
radio is whack, yo somebody gotta say this
same five songs on every single playlist (god)
and bad karma is the worst way to go
so I pray that god has mercy on your soul

yea
i mean you know I was gonna have something to say about this whole situation
cause for some odd reason
whenever some shit like this happens in regards to my peoples in the
society, in the media
it always manages to get swept under the rug
or end up right below the radar for some reason
like it never happened
but let it be any other race and this shit woulda been hit the fan

all my soldiers out there
its time for our voices to be heard yo
its no more of that shit
but you know I got love for everyone
whether you black, white, hispanic
that's why I love hip hop cause it bring us all together
im juss sayin
dont let it be your peoples that they dissin next time
making fun of they tradgedys just for a cheap laugh
and you sittin there like what the fuck
know what I'm saying
so keep them emails going through
keep them complaint letters goin out
keep them phones calls goin into the radio stations and the sponsers
tellin 'em how you feel
and what a fucked up move they made
let 'em know
let 'em know its about the people
and shout out to miss info too keep your head up ma
yeah
oh yeah and if all else fails
just turn the bullshit off

But u know i gotta give my shout outs....

**Parents.. w/o them i wouldn't be here.
*God, I'm still here.
*My KKPsi Fam.
*Everyone in blazer's band
*My roomies and Raye Raye ;)
*Blazer Radio Fam... crazy peeps
*Pudd... my heart
*Jerica... I know times are hard... if theres anything ... ANYTHING i can do, hit me up

*What up Selena :) ?
*My 360, Nappy, DO, S.I.G. forum fam.... in particular my DOX fam.*ALL my Texas peeps.. you know i miss yall: Candice, Aisha, Ashley, Daun'lee, Eric, Chris, Nikki
*ALL my NC peeps: Candise, Terrell, Gabe, Ryan, Natalia, Da Crew, Darien aka Casper aka Boo Boo ;) and my friend ill_city_mayor..
*All my NC fam.. yall know who u are.
*All my AL fam... yall know who u are

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